Hello to my New BEST Friends!
Are you looking to make THIRTEEN FIGURES this year???
How much IS that? 1,000,000,000,000!!!!!!!!!!
You can earn it working part-time while you lounge by the pool and drink Margaritas!! With your new and expanded income, you can build your own pool, hire the staff to clean it AND have them serve you on a silver platter.
You know you want it!!!!!
You know you need it!!!!!
And I have THE offer for you!!!!!
It’s best thing since beer in a can!!!!!
It’s the best thing since sliced bread!!!!!
It’s all that and a bag of chips!!!
And, you’ll lose weight too!!!!!
They said, “Build it and they will come.”
I built it and here you are! I opened my arms wide and created one big sales funnel.
Sign up now and I GUARANTEE your dreams will come true. You will generate income streams in your sleep. It’s so easy a baby could do it. Money will pour in while you watch cat videos on Facebook!
So what is it and how does it work?
IN 90 DAYS YOU WILL BECOME A BILLIONAIRE!!
Sign up here for my new video series: 1,000,000,000 in TEN WEEKS.
Lesson One: Connect with Elves, Fairies and Pixes while avoiding Gnomes
Just pay me $25,000 first.
Lesson Two: Finding Your One True Unicorn
Pay me another $25,000 before watching and learn how I found mine.
Lesson Three: Dancing Under the Rainbow Tree
You guessed it! $25,000 and you can watch this incredible five minute video.
Lesson Four: Taking it to the Bank
Final payment of $25,000 so I can take it to the bank too – because we are sharing the
Of course, you’ll want to STAY CONNECTED to your spirit so I
GUARANTEE that you will feel 50% more connected to
Your Favorite Source of Divine Energy!
After each video, you will have a chance to TALK TO ME LIVE!
Ask questions about my no-fail method of getting rich and gaining enlightenment without landing in hot water with the IRS.
Fortune tellers will also be on hand to answer your questions.
Sign up soon because this special offer WON’T LAST LONG!!!!
YOU BETTER BUY NOW!!!!!
Guaranteed or your money back (penalties and interest, fees and surcharges apply with restrictions).
Testimonial from Satisfied Customer:
OMG! Loran is my new BFF!
My life hasn’t been the same since I took Loran’s new ecourse 1,000,000,000 in TEN WEEKS. It literally changed my life!! Before, I used to work 75 hrs a week earning barely enough to make ends meet – I despaired that I would ever make anything of my life. I felt so disconnected from my true calling, like my soul was being slowly sucked out of me. But then I found Loran. Now I ride my unicorn to work, buy designer shoes and fly first class around the world. I only work 2 hrs a day and spend the rest of of my time working on my tan.
And I owe it all to Loran’s ecourse. I love you Loran!!
OK, so you know I’m kidding, right?
Writing a sales page is a challenge, especially taking what “everybody” says into account. I just had to vent a little. I’m tired of reading sales pages like this that make it sound so easy to get what you want by paying some guru to give it to you. The truth is it’s time-consuming and hard work.